Well, it’s that time of year again. Valentine’s day. Everything is pink, red, and white, and love is in the air. Everyone is on a sugar high from all those little tiny candy hearts. :yum I’m sure a million women will get a ring on their finger today, all over the world, because their guys are expected to be extra-romantic on this somewhat commercialized holiday. Well, congratulations to those women, whoever they may be.

I, on the other hand, got a different gift. And it was better than anything. My Matt picked out the single most romantic card in the whole world to get me, and mailed it here. I got it a little early, but no harm in that. It’s the next best thing to being next to him, so it makes me happy. No matter how much I miss him, I know that he really does intend to love me forever. That makes life worth living.

Congratulations, also, to my friend Adam, who is having a Second Life wedding today to the man of his dreams! He seems so happy, and for that reason, I’m happy for him. I just can’t wait to see how the wedding turns out (if I ever find out what time it is!).

I’ve never been a big fan of today. I’ve not once had a good Valentine’s Day. I’ve gotten dumped, cheated on, forgotten about, screwed over, and everything else you can think of. Or else I’ve been alone. Even though my fiance is 1400 miles away right now, I still know that he’s thinking about me and wishing he was here to do all the things we’d like to be doing on Valentine’s Day. This is my best Valentine’s Day ever, and I hope he knows that. I just hope we can be in the same room on our next one together!

He’s thinking about trying to come visit me on my birthday. I really hope that works out. It’s been exactly one month since I said goodbye to him and put him on a plane. And for that month, it’s made my heart ache every minute of every day to remember seeing him for the last time. I have been trying so hard to pretend that I’m okay, and that I can deal with this. I’m miserable, though. I know it could be worse, and I know that it’ll work out in the end, but it’s not fair. We’re good people, who are genuinely, truly and madly in love with each other. We’ve never done anything wrong or bad, and yet I feel like we’re being punished for something. It’s a cruel, cruel world when two people have to express their love through an internet connection, and have a deadline on their wedding.

He doesn’t know it, but I cry myself to sleep just about every night thinking about him. I’m surprised I still have any tears left to cry at this point! The only thing that makes any of it better is knowing that one day, we’ll get what we deserve. We’ll be together, and our lives will be happier and better than this. All I want is for us to have a nice home, and start a family together. And it’s amazing knowing that he wants the same thing.

Anyway, if anyone is curious, go here to learn about the history of this romantic holiday. It’s actually quite interesting!