I’m sure you’re all very excited. What can I say? I’ve got a lot of pet peeves. Notice the way “a lot” is two different words? That’s the whole reason for this rant!

Okay, listen up.

Exhibit A:

a lot - adverb
To a very great degree or extent; “I feel a lot better”; “we enjoyed ourselves very much”; “she was very much interested”; “this would help a great deal”

a lot
Very many, a large number; also, very much. For example, A lot of people think the economy is declining, or Sad movies always made her cry a lot. It is sometimes put as a whole lot for greater emphasis, as in I learned a whole lot in his class. It may also emphasize a comparative indication of amount, as in We need a whole lot more pizza to feed everyone, or Mary had a lot less nerve than I expected. [Colloquial; early 1800s]

These two definitions came from here.

Exhibit B:

al·lot- verb
1. To divide or distribute by share or portion; distribute or parcel out; apportion: to allot the available farmland among the settlers.
2. To appropriate for a special purpose: to allot money for a park.
3. To assign as a portion; set apart; dedicate.

This definition came from here.

Now, please explain why people think “alot” is a word. I have seen this, literally, 100 times in the past week. It’s everywhere! Alot, in all its “I’m not really a word” glory, is taking over the world!

Save me from this non-word, please. Save yourselves! Stop using it immediately!